Parenting techniques | Assertive Teenage Parenting
I want to first clear up a major parenting misconception: Are there any correct way/parenting techniques to raise a child? Straight-up, the answer is there is no one right way to raise a child. Like buying a car, becoming friends with your neighbors, or hanging out your clothes to dry on the clothesline, there is no single correct style you need to use for raising a healthy-minded, loving, successful child.
It is said, there are four parenting techniques you need to be alert for what parenting techniques are matched for a child. However, how you go about using the parenting styles is up to your own judgment. There is no one right way to use the styles because there are so many variables in parenting.
Four Parenting Techniques:
The four parenting techniques based on research in parenting are:
- Low love/low limits
- Low love/high limits
- High love/low limits
- High love/high limits
The love and limit parenting indicates how a parent disciplines their child. Hardly ever does a parent stay in one class as the parenting style changes according to time and aspects like parental understanding, moods, and maturity of the child. It is concerning to find the appropriate stability of love and limits that suit you and your child’s circumstances.
Firstly, love is not how much the parent loves the child, but rather is the visibility of love during the disciplining process. A father may show a low love parenting style though he might deeply love his son. If you have a high love parenting style, you will reason, talk, and spend more time with your child.
The second variable, limits, describes the boundaries placed around a child and how these boundaries are enforced. A low limits style involves little control and few limits for a child; while a high limits style involves clear boundaries and limits without having to be domineering.
The limits describe whether a parent disciplines using either passive, assertive, or aggressive discipline. Passive discipline is doing nothing; assertive discipline is a win-win outcome for the child and the parent where the parent establishes the child’s discipline based on their respect for you and your desire for them to follow rules; while aggressive discipline is said to be “old school” with techniques such as smacking, using a wooden space, and yelling.
Of the above four parenting techniques, you only exercise the one which feels accurate in your mind. If your parents used a high limit style on you and you felt this put you in-line, then it is likely you will adopt the same disciplining techniques.
On the contrary, if you felt your parents’ high limit style was overly aggressive and distasteful, you could use a low limit style because you hate how your parents told you what you can and cannot do. It is common to copy your parents’ style or swing to the opposing extreme. However you were raised, your parents’ parenting style has influenced you to a style that feels right to you.
Assertive Teenage Parenting —Teenager Developmental Needs
In Teenage Parenting, understanding teenager developmental needs will help parents to respond appropriately to the situation and this will help in reducing conflict and defiance. In Teenage Parenting, we will look at different teenager development needs by various parenting techniques.
One of the chief teenager developmental needs is the need to grow to be independent of their parent. It is a self-preservation instinct for a teenager to develop an independent streak. This is the time when the teenager will be testing the parent limit and breaking rules in order to establish his independence. Here the parent has to figure out where they need to compromise or negotiate and where they need to stand firm.
As teenagers become independent of their parents, they will start to define their own identity. This is where it is normal for teenagers to reject their parent ideas, opinions, and morals in favor of their friend thoughts, ethics, and morals. The parent has to accept this fact and not to be too emotional about it.
When they want to search their own individuality, they do not desire to come into view weak particularly to their friends and parents. When in a situation that has the potential to lead into a conflict, find a way for your teenager to give in gracefully without the teenager appearing to be weak or childish.
Teenagers naturally provide their mothers a more hard time than their fathers during the developmental need period. The teenager will identify who is the weaker link and will then attack and test that weak link to get what he or she wants.
In our society, the mother has a bigger exposure to the teenager as the mother spend a lot more time with the teenager than the father and also the father is usually the authoritative figure in the family. This is why the mother is usually given a more difficult time by the teenager. The father needs to provide support to the mother and act as a team in dealing with the situation by various parenting techniques.
Friends begin to play a bigger role during the teenager development need stage. This is a stage where the teenager will spend more time with friends than with the parent. Here the teenager will want to develop closer peer relationship to fulfill a sense of belonging in the group. The parent should play a role in supporting the teenager need but should set negotiable and nonnegotiable boundaries to ensure a safe environment for the teenager.
In Teenage Parenting, you will discover that there are more than various proven Parenting techniques that can help parents to deal with various teenager issues.
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