What are the Best Ways to Manage Relationship OCD in 2021?

Relationship OCD is a subset of OCD disease in which the sufferer consumes themselves with doubts about their personal relationships. The suffering from OCD assumes and builds doubts about their love for the partners and their partners’ love for them. They also question their attraction for their partners and the attraction of their partners for them. Building and assuming doubts is normal for a human being, but the person suffering from OCD builds this doubt on a daily practice. And this person’s doubts are mostly irrational and illogical.

Mental health specialists classify unhealthy jealousy and self-doubt in a relationship as a relationship obsessive-compulsive disorder (ROCD). ROCD one of the forms of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

Last update on 2021-09-26 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

How will you know that you are suffering from OCD?

Everyone gets irrational thoughts, but having irrational and illogical thoughts about your partner doesn’t mean that you are suffering from a relationship OCD. Because for people who are suffering from relationship OCD, their thoughts can be bothersome and can cause them extreme anxiety. No matter how much the patient tries to get rid of the thoughts, they don’t go away for that person. The person suffering from relationship OCD always analyzes himself and his partner based on qualities and always finds fault in his partner and himself.

An everyday example could be that a person is married to a beautiful, attractive, and funny person, but they always think they should find someone better who can give them more pleasure. Sometimes, a flaw in one’s partner’s eyebrows is a cause for relationship OCD because the patient is always pinpointing this simple flaw and then develops the idea to find someone else with better-looking eyebrows than the present partner.

Read: Best OCD Books | Along with the top 3 self-help OCD workbooks to manage unwanted thoughts 

What should you not say to someone with OCD?

Here are things you shouldn’t say to someone with OCD.

  • ‘Oh, don’t worry, I do that too sometimes.’
  • ‘So, why is your room a mess? 
  • ‘I am so OCD today! 
  • Followed by: ‘I’m a little OCD.
  • ‘I love my OCD
  • ‘Can you just stop that? 
  • ‘It’s all in your head.’
  • ‘You’re exaggerating.’

How common is Relationship OCD?

Obsessive-compulsive disorder is common. It affects over 2% of the population, more than one in 50 people. More people suffer from OCD than from bipolar depression.

Obsessive behavior in relationships

ROCD also is known as “Obsessive love disorder” (OLD). OLD describes the state of mind where you become obsessed with someone whom you think you may be in love with. You might feel the need to protect your loved ones obsessively or even become controlling of them as if they were a possession.

OCD Relationship Obsessions:
  • The patient builds fear in himself if he is not good enough for his partner.
  • The patient constantly second-guesses his love for his partner.
  • Also, the patient always wonders whether he is the right person for his partner.
  • The patient assumes that he does not make her partner happy as the right kind of person.

How do you know if someone is obsessed with you?

Signs of Obsession: 8 Signs of Obsessive Love You Can’t Ignore

  1. Something Feels Not Quite Right.
  2. No Time to Yourself. 
  3. Complete Lack of Privacy.
  4. Rampant Jealousy.
  5. They Keep You Away from People You Are Close to.
  6. They Constant Accuse You of Cheating. 
  7. Moreover, they Move a Little Too Fast.
  8. They Treat You Like You’re Made of Porcelain.

Causes of relationship OCD

The obsessed people try to prove that they actually do or that they’re enough for a partner. This constant obsession causes major anxiety. That in itself is the essence of OCD,” Harvey said, who struggled with various symptoms of OCD his entire life.

Last update on 2021-09-25 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

What does ROCD feel like?

ROCD often involves preoccupation, doubts, and neutralizing behaviors centered on one’s feelings towards a relationship partner, the partner’s feelings towards oneself, and the “rightness” of the relationship experience (relationship-centered; Doron, Derby, Szepsenwol, & Talmor, 2012a).

Affect of OCD in family relationships

The intensity of OCD can be different from person to person. Some people may desire to hide their OCD from their own families. However, the disorder may negatively impact social relationships, leading to frequent family and marital discord or dissatisfaction, separation, or divorce.

Is the relationship OCD a real thing?

Relationship OCD is also termed as Relationship Substantiation or ROCD, which is a subset of OCD. The victims are consumed with doubts about their relationship. They suspect their love for their partner, their attraction to their partner, their compatibility with their partner, and their partner’s love.

The common relationship OCD Pressures

Questioning: The patient suffering from relationship OCD is always preoccupied with very small details about an event and starts questioning them, which turns into thoughts that question everything about their relationship that he is not in a good relationship.

Researching: The person suffering from OCD constantly searches on the web about what a true relationship looks like.

Comparing: The patient always speaks to other people about the relationships. Then he compares his relationships with their friend’s “relationships and then the feeling that their relationship is not a good one compared to their partners.”

Reflecting: The patient always questions about his partner’s qualities. He often finds out the faults and concludes that his partner with her qualities is not good enough for a perfect relationship.

Seeking Passion: The patient becomes obsessed with sexual intimacy because he is always disparate in finding his partner’s passion. They always look for the perfect kind of love, which takes him away from experiencing that.

Creating rules: The patient always creates rules for their partners. When the partners can follow the rules, he thinks that the relationship is not good to continue, and because of not forgiving the partner for the mistakes, the relationship gets worse and worse.

Misconceptions about relationship OCD

  • Relationships must not have any lacking in them, and the person should always feel passionate all the time.
  • Developing the idea of finding the “perfect one,” and this idea leads to you finding faults in one’s partner.

Is ROCD curable?

So, in the end, the “cure” for OCD is to understand that there is no such thing as a cure for OCD. There is nothing to be cured. There are thoughts, feelings, and sensations, and by being a student of them instead of a victim of them, you can change your relationship with them and live a joyful, mostly unimpaired life.

Although your associations may never permanently go away, treatment will allow you to have healthy, happy relationships with others. If you suffer from OCD, then you will also have a severe anxiety disorder. But remember. It can be treated. To be happy from now, start by getting educated and making healthy living choices.

How to treat OCD in a relationship?

Like all OCD types, Relationship OCD can be treated with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), specifically with treatment approaches called Exposure with Response Prevention (ERP, and Mindfulness-Based Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy.

There are various ways to self-help against ROCD. Obsessive thoughts begin when the mind wanders and doesn’t have something to focus on. Popular self-help OCD books can help you get over your automatic negative thoughts and anxieties by increasing consciousness.

Here are some examples:

  1. Practice Mindfulness.  
  2. Control the feelings, and then Move On.
  3. Make a list of your positive and negative thinking. 
  4. Stop Comparing with others.
  5. Regular practice dairy writing; where you will include four things:
      • Event or situation where your negative thinking happened?
      • What were your Feelings?
      • Behavior or response: What was your behavior?
      • How could you think or perform alternatively to get a positive output?

After a time, you will research neutrally about the above facts or discuss them with someone confidential.

Foods that help with OCD

The bellow healthy foods that may help ease your child’s OCD symptoms:

  • Salmon, Tuna, Eggs & Other Omega-3 Foods.
  • Cottage Cheese, Yogurt, Skim Milk & Other Low-Fat Dairy Products. 
  • Oatmeal, Popcorn & Other Whole Grains. 
  • Berries, Broccoli & Other Fruits and Veggies.
  • Water.

Ways to date someone with OCD

You can date a man with OCD easily by the following procedure:

  1. Don’t make your partner feel weird. If you are really interested in having a long-lasting relationship with a person with OCD, you need to accept the condition more.
  2. Be aware of their feelings thinking, and needs.
  3. Respect his privacy.
  4. Know more about the treatment.
  5. Emphasis and be open about your needs.

How do you live with your OCD wife?

We recommend you to follow these guidelines:

  1. Help your spouse find the appropriate treatment for OCD and encourage them to participate in the therapy process actively.
  2. Stop enabling OCD in your home or your relationship.
  3. Try to communicate with one another about OCD stressors openly. To conclude, it can be said that the person who is suffering from relationship OCD puts huge pressure on himself and his partner an immense amount of stress. Relationship OCD sufferers allow their thoughts to destroy their relationships while thinking they are doing something good with their relationships. The patients should be provided with special support and care. The sufferer must go through a series of therapies to get over this disease and be e a normal person again who takes his relationships casually.

Last update on 2021-09-25 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

Frequently Asked Question 

Q. Can an OCD person marry?

Ans: If you have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD​), you know that your symptoms can often get in the way of establishing and maintaining romantic relationships. Indeed, many individuals with OCD are single, and those who are in a relationship or married often report a significant amount of relationship stress.

Q. What are the feelings possessed in relationship OCD?

Ans: People like Evelyn with relationship-centered obsessions often feel overwhelmed by doubts and worries. They focus on their feelings towards their partner, their partner’s feelings towards them, and the “rightness.

Q. How do you stop thinking about someone?

Ans: One of the most effective life skills is learning how to stop thinking about someone.

Slow Ways To Get Someone Out Of Your Head:

  1. Forgive To Forget.
  2. Respect Yourself. 
  3. Let Yourself Feel The Pain. 
  4. Avoid Substances. 
  5. Look Forward With Excitement.
  6. Talk To Someone Else!

Q. Can anxiety make you doubt your relationship?

Ans: Relationship anxiety can make you question whether you and your partner are truly compatible, even when things are going great in the relationship. Also, you might ask whether you’re happy or if you think you are.

Q. Does OCD get worse with age?

Ans: The OCD signs habitually worsen with age. People may have difficulty remembering when OCD began but can sometimes recall when they first noticed that the symptoms were hampering their lives.

Q. Is it healthy to be obsessed with your boyfriend?

Ans: Obsession is unhealthy. Being obsessed with your significant other can be harmful in many ways than one. Further, it does not go down too well with your beloved as well. One of the first signs for you to watch out for is that you keep talking about him or keep praising him all the time.

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